He Gave Me A Senior Discount Without Asking My Age
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He had no idea that I have just arrived, in my mind, at a strange era in my life. A place where I was trying to figure out how I had reached such a as stage of growth.
Not that type of growth that we hear so much about, financial, inner peace, and all of those amazing things, but the growth we never knew would come…
The 50’s.
I am quite sure that most men including, the young man who was my cashier that day, are clueless about what this means but women of this era sure do.
It is that time when our bodies, yet beautiful, seem to turn on us. That time when there are so many symptoms, that not only are difficult to keep up with unless written down, we aren’t always sure that those symptoms mean the same thing to other women.
I sometimes walk around wondering if the women I see in a run of a day are going through this thing they have always called, “the change”.
The day I was called to the front of the congregation (so it felt) to face my truth, I was happily shopping for items I needed at our local store.
I was thinking, I am changing for the better starting to come out of my shell. That shell represents the wall I have up that no one knows about. Or do they?
That skin I live in while in the process of freeing myself. Making my mind up to do those wonderful things for myself.
As I live in my newfound freedom, I hope it helps others. If so, I pray it will be a blessing. So, back to the store. As I am in te moment coming to terms with who I am, I head to the cashier with my few items.
I was greeted with politeness, which anyone could appreciate. A little small talk followed while he rang up my items. While I did the debit card thing, his light conversation continued, which was refreshing.
Then it happened. He read back to me the few items and prices I bought and ended the exchange with, “…andI added your senior discount.”
If I had on pearls, they would have been clutched!![]()
I stayed calm and tried to not be embarrassed. Then I thought, Don’t associates ask if you are a senior before giving the senior discount? Unless it is truly obvious??
Well, I do have a few gray strands on the sides, and I just turned 52 last May, but…
Didn’t he know?
Didn’t he know I have loathed this day since I was in my late 20s?
Didn’t he know that assumming a lady should be getting a senior discount is like assuming a heavier woman is pregnant? It is horrific!
I know that was dramatic. But it did sting a little.
Didn’t he know I just renewed my deflated inner strength recently?
Now this.
Didn’t he know menopause is alive and well around here these days? Just running through my veins?!
Didn’t he know that I spent most of my day figuring out how to dumb down and hopefully heal these dang hot flashes? What are these heat waves about anyway!!??
Didn’t he know that now I am going from still feeling awkward at times as I grow more mature that now I have to adjust to such a biological change that has me baffled?
These are definitely perceptions and hypotheticals (for the people in the back).
Of course, he didn’t know. (And he probably shouldn’t.)
He didn’t know because it is not about him or what he said.
He didn’t know because this is my issue and not his.
He didn’t know because what I feel is my perception and my journey.
He didn’t know because he truly gave me a gift that he would never understand.
Now I can see it that way.
Conclusion
‘The change”, I see, is more than biological.
It is more than my symptoms. It is more than my grief about getting older. It is a way for me to move into a new realm of my life.
An opportunity to use this time to learn more about who I am and how I cope with this metamorphosis called the human experience.
My time has arrived. I will change gracefully and begin to understand that it is a wll-designed next chapter in my life.
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